By: Brittnee Fehr
It is true that if we don’t have a healthy relationship with ourselves, we cannot align in a healthy relationship with another. We are not able to give or receive love to our full capacity if we have those inner child wounds of abandonment and self-rejection. Of course, rejection is an illusion that our mind creates, therefore, we must recognize it as such, and start to heal on all energetic levels in order to thrive and reach our highest potential during our short time here on earth.
Many people don’t know their own worth, cannot fully love themselves and simply, aren’t in alignment internally, therefore, they continue to attract others who are energetically a lower vibration as well. The type of people who haven’t yet accepted themselves (the good, the bad and the ugly) often complain and feel frustrated because they keep magnetizing the same type of romantic partners and friendships. These types of partnerships seem to bring them so much unhappiness because they lack passion and are completely unfulfilling at a deep soul level. When you begin to study and utilize The Law of Attraction, you will quickly discover that how you perceive yourself is what you will attract to you. The key is to constantly want to try and improve yourself in order to raise your vibration, so you are able to attract abundance and unconditional love into your life.
When you don’t know how to love yourself, you constantly look to others for validation and to approve of you. A good example of this is the vast majority of social media accounts. With this shallow type of thinking, such as feeling good about yourself because of the amount of recognition you receive online by people commenting on your content such as selfies or photos, you are attracting surface type of relationships into your life. Surface type of relationships are deep-seated in competition, jealousy and separation, which are experienced at lower vibrational frequencies or stages of consciousness.
A lot of people don’t even recognize that they crave attention, in whatever way, shape or form it may be received, even if it is given in an unhealthy and negative manner. They often equate acceptance with love. In our current times, it seems to be all about the optics; it is how you appear to others that makes you feel good and loved, instead of how you actually feel about yourself. This negative pattern of behavior includes thoughts such as, if I act or behave outside how people around me expect me to act, then they won’t love and accept me anymore.
This is also seen frequently in destructive personal relationships. For example, I still love this person, therefore, I have to put up with abuse in order to appease them, so they will love me still. Even though, you may equate acceptance with love, true, unconditional, divine love is a type of energy that vibrates at higher frequencies only. All other types of love, unfortunately, are far from the real thing. Higher realms or levels of love can be experienced by anybody and everybody at this time, as it is always available to us, however, most people do not get to witness or even experience these higher types of love because they have not yet learned to raise their vibration high enough, in order to operate at advanced and greater levels of consciousness.
A drastic shift in mindset is required at this time. It is pivotal to embrace the Law of Attraction and to revamp our thought patterns and the way our brain is wired, in order to encourage a generation of people who recognize their true worth, uniqueness, strength and most of all sovereignty. This is especially true for the younger generation, who have been raised with the internet and spend a great majority of time on social media. They need to work extra hard to learn how to expand their consciousness by releasing negative thoughts, fears and wounds that are being held within, either consciously or subconsciously.
There are many key points to remember when it comes to studying and learning from The Law of Attraction. What beliefs we have, whatever vibration we hold in our body and what we choose to focus our energy on (consciously and subconsciously), is what we ultimately manifest and is mirrored back to us by the Universe. If you hold onto those wounds and fears of rejection and abandonment in your relationships, often that gets stuck in your subconscious because you have created a negative and limiting story line attached to that experience. Often times, we blame ourselves because we feel that we are unlovable or unworthy of true love. This is another illusion of course, and what you internally believe, you will receive or manifest externally, sometimes not even realizing you are creating the negative relationships in your life because of the beliefs that you have about yourself. Simply put, if you don’t think that you deserve what you’re seeking, you’re not going to get it. Those deep, subconscious fears and doubts send messages loud and clear too. If part of you feels as though you are not worthy of what you are searching for, then that part of you is competing with your desire.
Once you are able to understand that every type of relationship that you attract into your life, is of your own creation, you can then take the steps to reconnect with your own mind, body and soul and rewire your thought patterns where you begin to fully understand that you will always be worthy, especially to be able to receive all-encompassing love from everyone you meet. You then can learn to build healthy, thriving relationships in your life. It is also important to understand as well, the internal stories or beliefs that you’ve created for yourself, what your subconscious is attached to, and how all of these things are blocking you from receiving the highest levels of love.
A large part of learning how to work with the Law of Attraction, is allowing yourself to re-write those stories that you have carried with you for so long. When you modify those narratives, you will begin to realize your worth and that you are loveable. Develop a self-love that is so powerful, that it will not only raise your vibration but completely transform you and the relationships that you attract into your world.
As you start to fully love yourself, this allows you to release fears and especially, abandonment issues. You then realize that none of these issues are personal. In fact, our souls have chosen to walk difficult paths, with tough life lessons such as rejection from another, in order to shake up those deep-rooted problems from our childhood and from our past lives as well. Once these troubles resurface in our minds and are acknowledged by us, we can then purge and finally release them, including the wounding and all of the illusions that we hold within our bodies. All that is left, is deep-rooted self-love.
What does it mean to truly love oneself? Are there certain behaviors that you exhibit, which no longer serve you and your highest good? Remember, as you ask yourself these important questions, we don’t get what we want in this life but we get what we are. In other words, what you embody, is what is given to you. If you are completely happy within your own skin, you have figured out one of the greatest life teachings, which ultimately aids in your soul expansion.
When I mention self-love, I am not just talking about how you feel about yourself when you gaze at your gorgeous physical human body in the mirror. I am more concerned about you learning to love the internal pieces of you, that are ugly and broken. I’m talking about your shadows, all of your imperfections, your vices, and your deepest, darkest secrets. To work through each one of these and bring them to light and into your conscious mind to work through is necessary in order to manifest the life you have always dreamed of. A great majority of people refuse to do the inner work and avoid it altogether because they are not comfortable in their uncomfortableness.
I can promise you that there is nothing to fear on your journey towards self-love. So many people express that they feel stress, anxiety and that everything in their life seems so uncertain, and most of all, they feel like they lack so much, in every area of their life. Now is the time to put an abrupt end to this scarcity consciousness and mental programming that has been with most humans their entire lives. To feel all of these uncomfortable feelings means you are on the right track towards healing. In fact, the entire process of discovering self-love and your true, authentic self, is designed that way, for you to feel out of place, unbalanced and distressed, because it pushes you out of your mental chatter and into the presence of now. Once you step into the emptiness of a now moment, that vastness and space in your mind where it is completely silent, is the divine. It is the very place where you will find peace. When your mind learns to become still, it is there, in that tranquility where the creation of all things exist. Tap into that.
Sure, it is wonderful to have a positive outlook on life, including an abundance mindset but without doing the difficult, internal work, the Law of Attraction simply won’t work. An abundance mindset comes from your conscious mind and about five percent of our thoughts reside here. The majority of our thoughts actually come from our subconscious mind, which was developed in utero and throughout our adolescence. Beliefs that were created then, are carried with you throughout your lifetime. These beliefs and thoughts are the momentum that carry your energy and if they no longer serve you, they need to be released.
So how do you get there? Simply, stop projecting your consciousness into the future (which really does not even exist) and dismantle the anxiety and guilt that you have attached to your past mistakes. If the Law of Attraction is not working for you, it is because you have not yet faced and let go of those subconscious thoughts and programming.
A good majority of humans are constantly moving the wheels of the mind in excessive thought, worried about how they are going to make enough money, or perhaps they are holding onto anger towards another person. All of those thought processes are being reflected out into their energy field, after all, you are a vibrating frequency of light. So, when those thought patterns keep perpetuating themselves, you are projecting this into your energy arena and ultimately, your thoughts are creating your reality.
In addition, in order to fully understand the Law of Attraction, tune in to your perception of your relationship with the universe. In other words, it’s important to examine how you feel about the way the universe interacts with you. Do you believe that you can influence your surroundings so things happen for you? Or do you believe things are always happening to you? See the two different mindsets? This is known as the driver’s seat mentality vs. victim outlook.
Lastly, by its very nature, the Law of Attraction connects you with higher, spiritual planes of existence. When you start practicing this law, you begin to see beyond the mundane, ordinary world. A new, brighter world opens up to you. A whole new universe that is overflowing with exciting possibilities for your future.
Within these higher levels of consciousness, you will be able to discover that other people are just aspects of yourself. Your entire life you have divorced yourself from other people because you have been conditioned to believe you are separate from everyone else. For example, “I look down on Cindy and cannot be friends with her because her belief system is not the same as mine.” If this is similar to your current way of thinking, this means that you are still rooted in a separation consciousness. If you are operating from a separation consciousness, how do you expect to become abundant? You cannot.
Within this particular stage of consciousness of being separate from others, there is an endless feeling of lack, instead of plenty. In order to attract amazing life experiences to you through The Law of Attraction, it is imperative to start viewing yourself as an equal counterpart to others in this life. Once you shift your thinking and know that you are a part of the whole and not better or more knowledgeable than anyone else, you no longer feel the need to separate yourself from others and defend your points of view. Nothing can really threaten you because you understand that every person is your brother or sister, just sharing a different perspective.
Many people will find that they may have a spontaneous spiritual awakening in those exciting possibilities, which are revealed to them by the universe. Connecting with the cadences of the universe and opening up to new potentials, awakens the spiritual force inside of you that is connected to everything around you. It is important to note that, The Law of Attraction demonstrates that you are connected to everything and everything is linked to you. You radiate love and always have been rooted in high frequency love, it was just lost somewhere along the way. It is time to remember your source, your inner strength and shine your divine light on the world. Step into the present moment and share your new discovery of powerful self-love with every one that you cross paths with along the way. Reveal your secret to success. Guaranteed, your light will spark significant and necessary change not only in others but also in the world around you.